Wednesday, October 17, 2012
fruit wise
It seems we're always helping ourselves to big full plate of misery. Why I can't say. All I know is that for some odd reason much of who we are and what are lives are about are wrapped up in feeling inadequate. To the contrary everything else besides us enjoy life with all its faults. Staring at an avocado and then at an almond this came to me. A tree understands and gives all it can unwavering from what it knows is its purpose. After a few different processes produces a dead end which fills with with the nectar of life. This sack if you will grows with all the nutrients provided by the tree until the conditions are right for it to fall to earth, be carried away by an animal, or picked and distributed by a higher intelligence. This dead end which is the natural process and life cycle of the plant does not err. It does not ask what it should do or if it's doing it right. Everything about it makes sense as if there were no other way. Because to us it seems normal to have options and opportunities to move around here and there, to choose a different path, a different direction, we commonly find ourselves lost wondering what happened and why such in-opportunities keep happening to us only to find out too much time later that it was the choices we made all along. What I am always troubled with is our resistance to make an investment in our own foul-ability early on in life. This may be one of our greatest discoveries and too many of us fight to dismiss it. We argue against nature that our choices are the right ones until we are left abandoned and angry. What is it about being wrong that is so disgusting that we would live alone and miserable? Is it to prove a point? That we didn't give up? That surrender isn't in our vocabulary? Are we trying to teach those around us a lesson? That we know the answers and that our way is the right way? If you ask me it looks as if this way of thinking always gets met with scrutiny to degree that leaves us in disarray and wondering how we got there. Impatient to get back on track we make mistake after mistake all the while feeling like we're losing more ground and making the choice to go even faster and harder blind to the possibility that we might be going in the wrong direction. What is hard to swallow is that we may be lost and that some of the advice we received in the past might have been sorely needed and ignored. What I fear most is that we never begin to listen again as we once did. With a feeling of awe and wondering that we are completely lost to what is being said, to what is being taught. We will never be to old, to wise, to mature, to adult, and definitely to smart to stop to ponder the words of another. The fact that we don't seek to be in this state of mind with a ferocity of a hungry lion or the intensity of a dying star needs to be given our attention like never before. Life is only more complex, and is only gaining speed and if we don't let go of our desires to be in control we'll never be able to step back to see the big picture in order to gauge if we're still heading in the right direction.
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8 comments:
One of the most beautiful and eloquent ponderings into the meaning of life I've ever read.
Love
xo
Amazingly profound my dear brother! I hope you dont mind, but I might re-post this. Love you so much!!
Wow! I am so touched by your posting my amazing bro! Your thoughts are so meaningful and profound. There are so many times when I have thought to myself "why are you thinking such pointless thoughts?!" or "why are you repeating things in your mind that don't need to be repeated? Why can't you think about more meaningful things that will actually serve a purpose and be worth thinking about." So, I love when I can lay in bed every night and ponder upon life and the many blessings and opportunities it provides and think of ways to be able to bless others lives and give back. Thank you for expressing your thoughts and inspiring me. Love you so much!!
I would LOVE for the chance to get to talk with you, I miss your face :) xoxo Becca- rsgunter at gmail
In the Buddhist teaching, the first of the Four Noble Truths is “Life means suffering”. Decades ago, I was a member of a men's group, led by a “crazy” old man named Richard. He would tell us this: “Life is suffering”. I resisted this vehemently, because I was discovering a different aspect of existence – one of bliss, Love and support from beyond. I was having experiences of transcending suffering. One poignant example was on a ferry boat on the Strait of Georgia just off Vancouver Island. It was a cold early December morning. The day before, I had a profound opening of my crown chakra during a spiritual retreat. The light of the dawning sun was playing amazing tricks with the water and the wintery clouds that sheathed the sky in ice, and I was out, with my camera, in the frosty wind, with no jacket and no care for the cold.
But, in the days that followed, suffering kept creeping in.
Over the years, I've been guided to an understanding of this alternate way of being. It started with noticing how, while working on an art project, or anything that I intensely loved doing, I would go for hours with out eating – I would come out of the one-pointed focus to limbs that had become numb due to lack of circulation. When I was concentrated on cutting a design in a linoleum block, or doing an intricate pen and ink drawing, I tuned out suffering. Later, it was meditation that progressed this to the point where, now, in the background of my daily life there is a current of bliss that buffers most of the ambient suffering of daily life. If I call it to the fore, the more extreme suffering of daily life becomes far more tolerable, but that still takes effort and becomes a contest between the immediateness of the discomfort and the power of my will. The more intense the suffering, the harder it is to call forward the bliss.
Because suffering and discomfort continued to be a problem, I began an inquiry into what suffering is. The second of the Four Noble Truths is “The origin of suffering is attachment”. In looking at my own life and conduct in that life and in the conduct of others, it became clear that attachment to things truly was the source of most pain and suffering. Whenever I lost something or it was taken from me, pain ensued, in the form of grief and fear. These emotions would, often, lead to anger and even rage and to various degrees of paranoia and even hate. When I tuned into this in myself, I had an “ah-ha!” moment regarding attachment.
In the New Testament, Mark 3:31, Jesus relegated his mother and brothers to the same emotional level as all of humanity. He, basically, had no special attachment to them above any attachment he had to all of humanity. I came to realize that my attachment to loved ones is another source of suffering—a more difficult source to overcome, especially when the attachment is to family members. Partly because of the biological affinity, but also because of the cultural indignation such an “attitude” will generate.
From a book called “Working On Yourself Doesn't Work” by Arial and Shya Kane, I was introduced to a powerful technique for vanishing pain. Shya was riding with Arial on his motorcycle when her unclothed leg touched the hot exhaust pipe. A severe burn resulted, sending Shya in to screams of agony. Arial caught her attention and asked her to give him a number between 1 and 10 to rate the pain. She screamed “10”, then he asked her if the pain had a texture, what would it be? Still screaming, she answered something like, “sharp like broken glass”.
“What color is it?”
“Red!”
“One to ten, how bright is it?”
“10!”
“OK, now, what is it's texture?”
“Really rough sand paper!”
“Color?”
“Orange, bright orange!”
And so on, until upon a repeated asking for a pain intensity number between one and ten, the number gradually decreased until it was in the range of 2 or even 1. [continued in next comment...]
[...continued from previous comment]
That gave me my first glimpse into the possibility of detachment, and awareness of the power to overcome suffering, thus providing, for me, evidence that the third Noble Truth could be true: “The cessation of suffering is attainable.”
According to the Teaching[sic] of Buddha, a book I acquired from a stay at a Japanese hotel in San Francisco [instead of the ubiquitous Bible, the book in the bedside drawer was one about the Buddhist “Religion”], the cessation of suffering is obtainable through Nirvana. Nirvana is a Sanskrit word meaning “freedom from all worries, troubles, complexes, fabrications and ideas”.
I have had several experiences of this. I was free of all concerns, worries, desires, pains. I was in love with everything, fascinated with everything with no judgment or negative feelings. In each case it faded after at least a day and at most three days. I sought this experience for most of my life, aware of it's possibility as a teenager. I expected it to happen as an event that would transform me such that I would forever, hence, be free of suffering. I've come to realize that it's a lifestyle of discipline and devotion. My current trek is towards adopting this lifestyle. This is the Fourth Noble Truth, “The path to the cessation of suffering” – a gradual path of self-improvement, which is described in more detail in the Eightfold path (not that I'm promoting Buddhism, but there is clarity in this teaching over others that I have studied).
I am also coming to realize that it's possible to experience life from a place of blissful acceptance. While detached, one chooses to be involved. One can achieve a “detached attachment”. An attachment by choice that can be severed at will, with a commitment to the natural process of grief. There is a beautiful description of this in the book, The Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman. The book tells of a man who owned a restaurant that one day burned to the ground. He responded with a powerful impulse of grief that lasted only a minute or two, after which he gleefully walked away and on to the next adventure in his life (in the second book it is revealed that the fire was destiny, helping him let go of one life to embrace another). He was attached to that restaurant because preparing food was a life passion for him. But he was willing to give it up in an instant if called to other duty, as he was. He had detached attachment.
I'm learning that being in this state of detached attachment is all about love and compassion. It's a paradox: non-attachment seems to require a caring for life. Out of this comes a desire to serve. And, service, I have found, is the pinnacle of both suffering and bliss. When one eschews self concern (i.e. narcissism), one finds an avenue to Joy like no other. It's another paradox: by embracing the suffering of others one encounters a kind of blissful suffering that is ultimately and intensely rewarding.
But, still, the question of what is suffering? I believe it is none other than the result of being in the body—the ultimate attachment. This thing that seems to be who we are, is bundled with nerves that transmit both pain and pleasure. Animals exist in this state without a choice. We humans have a further dimension of experience: we can act against our fate. We can make choices regarding our actions and our perceptions. [continued in next comment...]
[...continued from previous 2 comments] There is another book, one that I can no longer find, that is a synopsis of the ancient Vedic documents (the basis of what, in the west, is called “Hinduism”). In this book, all of life is described, through it's history, as going though “gates”. Each gate is guarded by a “dragon”, a metaphor for the discomfort of fear that arises from the unknown and from a fear of destruction. One of those gates or transitions, was from the animal obliviousness to the meta-consciousness that humans experience. This is a relatively new development, as, according to archeological science, humans (or homo-sapiens) have been on the planet for round 200,000 years, whereas life has been around on the order of a couple of billions of years. So, basically, we're still trying to get the hang of this new consciousness. It gives us great power, as evidenced by our massive alteration of the planet – and our ability to wipe out all life as we know it. It also can give us great grief, as you [Jamin] pointed out in your posting, above. Figuring out how to “be” in this 'new' state of awareness is the “puzzle du jour”, the solution of which shall lead to the next gate in our evolution. You can be consciously involved in this evolution or you can be one of the unawake throng that are buffeted by their own feelings, attachments, and woes.
But, what of this body thing that appears to contain our identity? I have had way too many experiences that go beyond the “5 senses, one life” character of the body, to continue to believe that I AM this body. It is clear to me that, though the body dies, the essence of who I really am, will live on. Though, this “identity” may be unique to this lifetime, “I” have had glimpses of a broader “I” that will survive this identity. It is only my “ego” that is concerned with this loss and that has trouble fathoming an existence or energy pattern that supersedes this body identity. I think the ego is a manifestation that parallels the body, and in fact, makes it possible to “land” in the body and have a grounded experience in this 3 dimensional world (I call it three dimensional even though there is a fourth dimension [time], because in this world we have no (known) freedom of movement in that dimension).
The implication of a super set identity is that this body identity is not to be taken seriously. It is merely a game piece in a delusion that is falsely called “reality”. Even science acknowledges this. Matter that appears solid, is mostly composed of empty space (or perhaps “dark matter”). Matter is a phantom composed of particles of energy. The whole Universe is nothing more than a fantastically huge holo-deck! If you believe your senses you're a fool – as the senses are constantly fooled. Just look at an optical illusion or ponder the fact that we perceive merely a tiny sliver of the full expanse of electromagnetic radiation! For everything that we “see”, there's a vast range of things we don't see. We only see the wavelengths of light, and can sometimes feel into the infrared. But we have no direct experience of the radio spectrum or any of the wavelengths beyond violet – though, truly, we will feel after effects of too much exposure to shortwave UV in the form of a “sunburn” and we may suffer from the destruction to the body from the higher wavelengths, such as x-ray, and gamma ray, but we can't really perceive these wavelengths. Also, can you see magnetic fields or electrostatic fields? I think not.
Then what of events that occur outside our range of perception? That, too, is an indication of our limitation. Thus, it is folly to claim that you know anything about life, reality and the Universe based on your perceptions or even the perceptions of others.
[...continued from the previous 3 comments]
Not until you develop senses beyond the 5 flesh bound senses can begin to open to what is really out there. Not until you have experienced the true reality can you even evaluate yourself or your state of being (you have no standard for judgment, either of the self, or of others). So, of course you feel inadequate – because you ARE inadequate – at least this is true of your body self. There are the few, of course, that are something like an “alpha dog” or “alpha female” who have a sense of being on top of the world. They tend to be the only creatures that get any satisfaction in the material world from the perspective of “animalism” – and I define animalism as the state of being in animal nature. Just watch nature shows. You will see the pecking orders and alpha dominance, and lizard brain reasoning that composes the animal life. Tribal rights, traditions, and cultural agreements, are all manifestations of animalism in the human experience. The difference is, humans have the intelligence to brood about it and compare themselves to the “winners” and label themselves losers (this is the true meaning of biting the apple from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil—it's really the tree of judgment – a power that can be very useful but that can also wrap us in thought patterns that produce great misery—be suspicious of what your mind is telling you or as one of my favorite comedians, Emo Philips, would say: “I used to think the brain was the most wonderful organ in my body. Then I realized who was telling me this.”). This is attachment to ideas as a cause for suffering. Break out of these patterns and find freedom from the misery they induce. Question everything! Look beyond cultural norms, religions dogma, familial and ancestral patterns, and the urgings of the body. Learn to listen to the body with discernment. Learn to identify the important cravings, such as hunger, thirst, sleepiness, the need for elimination, and eschew the unimportant ones such as greed, avarice, wrath and a desire for revenge, lust, gluttony, pride, sloth, envy – in other words, rule your body, don't let it rule you. Then learn how to listen to the “still, small voice”–Love's whisper—your higher self that exists in the “oneness”.
My mother taught me about this when, one day, I came to her excited about something, and she said, “This to, shall pass.” It was a “thank you very much” moment that led to an important lesson about conquering my “self”. Wait it out, count to 10 or however high it takes to allow the feeling to pass. Directing your attention to service is a powerful way to “get out of yourself” and beyond the bodies onslaught. Or get yourself involved in something you're passionate about, and refocus on that, if something pisses you off or rouses any of your bodies other negative emotions.
The body is a machine running amok– get yourself behind the controls.
But, what is the common thread in all of this? The power of doing something you're passionate about or of being of service? Love. Not the love what many confuse with lust, but the Love that puts others before the self. The Love that has one brave the body attachments to walk in life as a teacher or healer or mother or father or friend. The Love that finds a way to peace in even the most violent or hateful situations. The Love that will trade life for salvation. The Love that is at the core of everyone – in the silence within – the still, small voice – that can only be heard out of pure intent to listen.
This is what I have learned so far. I am still working on implementation, having had some success but many failures. But, I have learned enough to not chastise myself for the failures. I know this takes time, and that failure is merely a stepping stone to success. After all, the Universe has been around for some 13 billion years, and appears to be able to last far longer than that, so what's your hurry?
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